 |
| Frank |
 |
| Snack Cake |
It has been over a year since the passing of my old Border Collie Frank, and is slightly before the one-year birthday of my new Border Collie Snack Cake. It's kind of strange, that even though I waited and grieved the passing of Frank for several months, I still ended up with another Border Collie born in the same month that Frank passed away in. Maybe, like the Tibetan Buddhist belief in reincarnation, perhaps Snack Cake is another reincarnation of Frank. Okay, maybe not exactly Frank, but still very reminiscent of him.
 |
| Frank and I |
You change after the death of a dog you loved so dearly. You spend a great deal of time reflecting on their life and role in yours. You go back mentally and visit the time when you saw them for the very first time, their first trick, all the memories from the prime of their life, and the moments right before the end of their life. It all becomes so precious. The memories, life, dogs, events with them, and so on. Then there's the void and the grief.
Everyone grieves differently, but at some point in life, we all grieve. For me personally, I begun to feel loss when I left my family due to separation. I missed Frank every day and started looking for ways to fill the void. My first inclination was to get another dog. But I was hesitant, because I saw it as a form of respect towards Frank by not replacing him before he decided to leave this world. I am very glad that I didn't go out and get another dog before Frank passed away. I was able to contemplate during the time before his passing and instill in myself a deeper love and appreciation for my loyal companion.
 |
| Spry Young Frank |
Frank passed May 7th, 2022; it was the day of my oldest daughter's prom. How sad and hard it must have been for her to lose a childhood friend on a day that's supposed to be happy and celebratory. When I received word from my ex-wife that Frank had closed his eyes and stopped breathing, I might as well have been stung in the heart. My eyes welled up with tears and I sobbed for the remainder of the day.
I remember crying for the rest of the day and my chest burning with grief. Later that evening I would go and buy some Heineken and spend the night drinking to Frank's memory. The next day there was a terrible void, and I knew that I had to go through the grieving process.
But how long was I supposed to grieve? When would I feel like loving another dog? This I don't have a clear memory of, but I know it took several months for the feeling of wanting to move on to take effect. It finally came to the point where I knew I needed to fill the void. This void that I speak of is created through loss, and everyone is a little different when it come to the actual time to replace or fill it.
 |
| Snack Cake's CL Ad |
I found Snack Cake on Craigslist, for sale by an eastern European woman, maybe from the Ukraine or Poland, or someplace like that based upon her accent and demeanor. When I picked up Snack Cake, as a pup, it was like a breath of fresh air filled my lungs. My mind was filled with wonder and excitement. I was a new proud parent all over again.
 |
| Me and Snack Cake |
After you get another dog, especially after the loss of another, you take more pictures, you cherish every milestone, and you give more attention than you ever thought possible to the new puppy. The new life does not replace the old, but rather introduces the opportunity for improvement and love.
 |
| Snack Cake with a Bone |
Frank will always hold a special place in my heart, and Snack Cake has shown me the human heart is capable of infinite love. Snack Cake and Frank have touched me and changed me for the better and I can't wait to create new adventures and love the old.
 |
| Water color of Frank by OakLynn Mackey |
No comments:
Post a Comment